2010/01/29

The Challenge

Well I've done the women's marriage ministry challenge already (see previous post with link) but the lessons that it teaches are ones to emulate in everyday married life, so I'm glad to do it again. The first two challenges went well, because Pookie & I have both come to expect an intimate greeting from each other when he gets home.

 Last night though we had a stupid fight about something insignificant and it brings me to today's challenge about respect. Pookie was trying to avoid any disagreement & I felt ignored. This is a cycle I have to keep praying about to break. When we respond based on feelings, it usually blows things out of proportion and leaves us feeling quite silly when tempers have calmed down. Doing the challenge again helps me to remain focused on making the changes in me & my marriage, a permanent part of our lives.

At the beginning of the year I came up with the idea that we should make a united effort to spend more "just us" time despite our busy schedules. The idea is to have a date night once a month, where I'm in charge of January's date, him February etc. The rules are it should be low budget, so that we get more creative & see how much thought the other person put into their date planning & because our aim for this year is to completely get out of debt. There will be no complaning about the date eg. If I plan an event that he doesn't think he will enjoy then he can't complain about it ( this has been a problem of sorts because my husband doesn't like to step out of the box even though he usually loves the experience & I want to be more appreciative of him & his efforts). Also, the date can run anytime that month, the other spouse just needs enough time to organize babysitting and ensure it doesn't clash with work, etc.

Well this month was a trial run & since it was my idea I went first. So Pumkin-pie had a sleepover with grandma & I planned my date for that night with alot of prayer (you see if this date bombed then the idea would be a no-go with Pookie). There is a decking above our verandah (quite common for Caribbean houses) and the view is awesome up there especially at night. I had gotten some fried wantons, which we both love, from the retaurant we had our reception & anniversary dinner. That and some hot chocolate with marshmallows.

It had been raining heavily that afternoon & it made me worried but then I prayed that God would help me with a way to make it work. The rain stopped & the weather was perfect. It was just the right amount of chill for cuddling & enjoying our hot chocolate. I enjoyed it fully & so did Pookie. We talked for hours up there and discussed our hopes and dreams. Quite romantic it was & cheap too:) I can't wait to see what he'll do for February and I'm praying that he follows through and not give up on us spending time together, because that's what I'm after. These connections that make everything seem worthwhile and that God is indeed smiling down on our union.

2010/01/27

'Til Death

My marriage is very important to me, even more so that we have experienced some very trying & "deal breaker" times. The Lord places alot of importance on the institutions of marriage & family; And it is guidelines from the Word of God that has kept me going in my role as a wife. I have discovered a blog dedicated solely to marriage based on the real life experiences of its author Aimee Freeman. Check out http://www.womensmarriageministry.blogspot.com/ it is encouraging & she is about to embark on a 14 day challenge that has reinforced all that God was trying to show me on being the wife He called me to be.
So if you have a great marriage & even a not so great one, join in the challenge & spread the word & get a lot of people following God's will for successful marriages & the way He intended for them to be.

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2010/01/07

Surely Goodness and Mercy...

...shall follow me all my days.

Lately I've been coming up short. And this happens, part of life I think. Just not getting anything done right, lots of mistakes in almost every life area and people you care about being short or simply annoyed at you. This happens too. Feeling down about it. This happens as well; to me that is.
Add to that mucho financial setbacks and in my mind things escalate. I'm the type of person that sometimes worries about money, meal planning, parenting, marriage, other relationships until I have a headache. Worry is a sin that I've been trying to shake for awhile now; sometimes successfully but somehow it has crept right back. What does my Lord say about this? "Be careful (anxious or worried) for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God." Philippians 4 vs 6.

So I pray about it. This worrying is my weakness and often how the enemy tries to keep me from the full joy I have only in the Lord. This is how he tries to disrupt my identity in Christ, by trying to trick me into taking up my burdens and struggling with them when Jesus already said that those with their heavy burdens must come to Him and He'll give us rest.

So God delivered me from my downcast spirit this afternoon with a song. It reminds me that He doesn't love me because of anything I've done or not done well, but because He's Good & Merciful. So all my feelings of not being enough at times in this life doesn't warrant me being down on myself, for my God is more than enough.